funny response to are you still alive

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funny response to are you still alive

Youre about as sharp as a bowling ball. This is perhaps not for the faint-hearted. 2023 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. Is my relationship status a joke to you?! When they play it cool, play it ice cold. If this doesnt cause them to reply, then maybe you should rethink your friendship with this person. Check out: Image credits Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash. Are you asking just to make yourself feel better? Thats funny, because everyone on it is a prick. and our Real may recognize real, but real also recognizes thoughtless people who don't deserve your time. For example, if it is a friend, you can be funny or witty. Like "I am not a Sunday morning inside four walls with clean blood and organized drawers. Your lips are moving, but all I hear is blah, blah, blah.. Awwits so cute when you talk about things you dont understand. Talk is cheapbut then again, so are you. For example, when people expect you to say yes, you say no; when people wish you to say a big number, you give a tiny number. Alexa's response: No, that's not true. You dont need to say it. Is it your job to spread ignorance? Thats because I eat Doritos chips too loudly. June 14, 2022; pros and cons of stem cell therapy for knees . | Are you surviving? Try these OOO messages to let people know you're taking a break. It would be great if puppies would stay puppies forever. 3. Before you complain about anything, be thankful for your life and the things that are still going well.". 54 Exciting What If Questions - Best Ways You'll Love Fun - Mantelligence In the past, one way to send messages was to attach them to a pigeon. Not Bad. "All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage." Lord Byron (poet) Maybe the reply is just taking a long time to come back. Still with us. This was one of the quickest ways there was to send a message from one person to another. Hopefully, not as good as I will ever be. Read about the differences between burning alive, staying alive and being dead or alive as we explore the many ways of keeping ourselves in the land of the living. 28 Witty Responses To Ghosting That'll Haunt Them Forever - Bustle The answer is simple. I was actually talking to my friend". I'm alive, whoa! Then I hope you find someone whos good looking, honest, smart, and cultured. I am high-quality, 100% plant-fed. 85. You are about as interesting as a documentary on dirt. If you have nothing to add and to share with a person, this saves their day, too. 35 Auto Reply Text Message Ideas: Funny, Professional, Effective I didnt realize it at first, but I grew up and turned into a Squidward. You look tired. Things could be worse I could be you (for siblings ). (Heres What To Do), Roommate Sleeps in Living Room All The Time! I dont chase them just to satisfy my sexual desires. For some reason, some people think that not texting back is cool. There is no gray area (<brain matter joke): either you are brain-dead or you are not. I guess what Im trying to say is, pick your response carefully based on who youre talking to. Keep calm and be awesome. A A A Remember the time when you hated your ex too much that you wanted him dead? 45. Congrats, guys! Still, the ghosters ghost on. I used to think you were a pain in the neck. Some of the best, wittiest, and most humorous quotations in the English language are quotations about age, childhood, adolescence, middle age, and old age most of all, about growing old! Just Smile And Nod [Read: 12 types of humor you can use and how it affects the people around you]. Every civilisation has its genesis and its conclusion. I thought I had the flu, but then I realized your face makes me sick to my stomach. I have a feeling that my soulmate is somewhere out there pushing a pull door right now. Why not laugh about it and allow it to bring us closer together? We cant always get what we want now, can we? Getting into a romantic relationship with someone may seem like a good idea, but so was getting into Titanic. Taco Tuesday is pressure enough, I tell you! As a result, they were so fixated on thinking about you, they forgot to reply to you. If theyre too busy to text you back, you need to be too busy to continue having them in your life, or on your social media. "My level of sarcasm has gotten to a point where I don't even know if I am kidding anymore.". "Yeah, you're three years late. I havent found anyone who matches my kinks yet. 2. Let them know that you're itching to go on a date. "It's your ego that wants to lash out," Winter tells Bustle. More like give me a sign that you're still alive. Youll never be even half the man your mother is. 36. I cant even afford to feed myself! Another excuse that people use is Im just hoping in the shower. I know youre nobodys fool, but maybe youll be adopted someday. Whoever cast a voodoo spell on my love life can chill now. Is that a scar on your face? 76 Best Replies and Answers to How Are You Doing? - Trending Us How do you usually respond to the question? Dear family and friends of Arthur Dayn, As we enter into an unprecedented dark age with the invisible enemy known as COVID-19, the life of our dear friend Arthur Dayn ends. Everyone knows a happy dog wags his tail, so if you're feeling happy and joyful, this would be a good response to give to someone asking how you're doing because it's clever and unique. However, it is best to stick to the basics with a colleague. Listen, maybe your crush really did lose their phone. 99. Best Answers to the "What You Do For a Living?" Question This is one of those worst epic responses to I love you makes us feel for the poor love-struck fellow. Trying to remember the name of that weird person you remind me of. If ignorance barrel prices go up, I want drilling rights to his head. Nah, just kidding (though it might be true to some of you). Its always annoying when people take a long time to reply. This might be okay if they take up to 24 hours, but not more than that. Steven Wright (comedian), "What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death." If you're really feeling them, you can give them one last chance to make up for their communication lag. Is It A Bad Idea To Lose My Virginity To An Old Crush? Thats because theres no vacancy in my heart. You have more faces than Mount Rushmore. Good luck feel free to drop me a comment below if you have any funny responses I should add to the list, and do let me know if you get any memorable responses back. That's impossible. But, whats the likelihood of that happening? 101 Funny And Witty Responses To The Question "How Are You?" Truth is, we all have ugly experiences with our past lovers. 10. 2023 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. I was gonna try #6 "Any finer I'd be China." What to Say When Someone Calls You Cute? - Beezzly Break the cycle, rise above, focus on science! I never even listen when you tell me them. Oftentimes, these people just cant help but stick their noses in things they actually have no business with. Your hair looks great! Your response should depend on the rapport you share with the sender. Alive Quotes (560 quotes) - Goodreads Save the high-quality PDF version on your device now. Call the police." 13 Quora User Theres only one problem with your face: I can see it. However, I dont recall anything about morons. My day was fine, it was everything else that was the problem. Better inside than outside. It looks a little too clingy and hard to maintain. You are shocked by his/her response, and you respond angrily "but what about me?". 1. Who told you that? Watch the video: Only 1 percent of our visitors get these 3 grammar questions right 30 Best Responses To An Apology For A Late Reply. Im always there when I need me. The Funniest Replies for People Who Are Always Asked "Are You Okay?" HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. And maybe thats the reason why theyre taking so long to reply. but that was before I read Fred's comment below. I was hoping you would be able to tell me that. Im glad that I sleep so peacefully, knowing that Im single and aint nobody cheating on me tonight. - Anonymous. My favorites were: "I'd rather have bamboo shoots shoved under my toenails." "I'd rather be in hell with both arms cut off." He was an angry, creative man. "Fine" is a boring conversation-killer. Are you going to help me have a good day? How to Respond to An Insult With Humor? 41+ Best Comebacks Make sure you give witty responses only to persons close to you, or you know they wont get offended by such responses. I think it's a great response when you're possibly feeling cranky. Im a wreck of a human being, thats why! 59. "Any day above ground is a good day. I wrote him a cheque for it, post-dated of course. Chic Murray (comedian), When I die, I hope to go to heaven, whatever the hell that is. Ayn Rand (author), The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesnt get worse every time congress meets. Will Rogers (actor), "My grandmother was a very tough woman. Alexa's response: I'm sorry, Dave. This one could be a funny or cute response to sorry for a late reply, based on how they take it. " Actually, you're mad" is a version of the classic, rhetorically sophisticated comeback "I'm rubber, you're glue." This one is the white-belt level of "who's mad?" martial arts a simple. Spiritually? (Use a sexy tone). Perhaps you are just such an exciting person. But if youre getting fed up with always being asked the same questions, you shouldnt feel bad about giving a funny or witty reply. Haha use this humorous response to make someone laugh-you never know, you just might brighten their day. Recognize the other person's boundaries, and try not to cross them. I see youve chosen this time to humiliate yourself in public. Maybe their roommate was sick. I hope you like some of them. Maybe because I lick my plate clean after having a scrumptious meal. Funny Response to "What Are You Doing?" "I cry." Humor is about creating surprises. If receiving a text from your ex elicits strong negative feelings, it is best not to respond. I have been going through GOT in my work life. I was doing great, before you came. Opposites attract, right? Aeldrion 5 yr. ago. How are you? could be much more than a basic question, but we tend to stick to the same old, half-hearted responses. There are nosy people everywhere! Thats why Im single. How to respond to an ex asking how you are? 12. 100+ Funny Things to Ask Alexa (with its Hilarious Responses) - ITTVIS Over The Phone or On The Phone Which is Correct? *wink*. Thats because I only enjoy long, romantic walks to the fridge. Be Thankful To Be Alive Quotes. 10 Perfect, Sarcastic Responses To Annoying Humblebrags It takes a specific kind of person to ghost someone its really not that hard to send a quick Im not interested text but rest assured, they exist. So, it might be wise to double-check they're still alive before you complain. Tell her that you're there for her to make her laugh, if she needs some company. That will ensure there will be at least one man who will regret my death. Heinrich Heine (author), Fear of death increases in exact proportion to increase in wealth. Ernest Hemingway (author), Its funny the way most people love the dead. You'll be asked how you are almost every single day, which is why you should add some humor to your answers. I am not looking for anyone, and neither is anyone looking for me. Great, because my name wasnt in todays obituaries. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Im not single. Come to think of it, your face is old, too. 95+ Heartwarming Alive Jokes | buried alive, stayin alive jokes Rita Rudner (comedian), "When I die, I want my body to be donated for research, but more specifically, to a scientist who is working on bringing dead bodies back to life." Funny and Clever Quotes About Mortality, Death, and Dying Not sure why you're asking me my age. Here's a 13-second video explaining how Jennifer Lawrence uses this Surprise Theory: 39. Because my milkshake doesnt bring boys to the yard. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if Im not there, I carry on as usual." Heart-shattering. 96. Funny Responses to "How Are You?" (& Other Questions!) - Science of People By acting as though they are replying too fast, you highlight the fact that they are replying too slow. upstart loan login; jim bell siloam mission salary; . "I'll get back to you once I'm back from my long-awaited trip to the fridge.". Cant complainI have tried, but no one listens. What could go wrong? For instance, have you hooked up since you've broken up? Are those space pants? Maybe because I have a Ph.D. in impatience. Unlikely, but worth a shot. 6. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. 30 Funny Comebacks For Late Messages - Grammarhow How Am I Still Alive #shorts #overwatch2 #overwatch - YouTube Our goal is to create English lessons that are easy to understand for everyone. 11. Mentally? If you like me, send them while Im alive. Brian Clough (football team manager), I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure. Clarence Darrow (lawyer), Millions long for immortality who dont know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon. Susan Ertz (author), In this world, nothing can be certain, except death and taxes. Benjamin Franklin (inventor), Life is hard. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. 63. . How much are you willing you pay me if I tell you? Perfect for that BRB, shower text that they never BRBd to. Are you serious? It would be easy to answer that question with a simple "I'm fine, thank you.". Liked what you just read? This one is a bit depressing, which is why you should watch when you use it. Because it sounds like some kind of automated message. Just because you have a dick doesnt mean you need to act like one. Looking for funny responses to everyday questions? Its too small to be out there all alone. WHAT DID THEY SAY?? Are you alive? - Random Answers - Fanpop 20 Funny Out-of-Office Messages to Inspire Your Own [+ Templates] - HubSpot Trying to understand the meaning of life or the universe at least. 5 Ways To Respond To Hey Stranger And Other Annoying Texts 9. You just live. It looks like your face caught fire and someone tried to put it out with a baseball bat. I'm so sorry I expected you to acknowledge my existence after hanging out? If you are not happy being single, then you will never be happy being in a relationship. Why is it OK for you to be an idiot, but not OK for me to point it out? I could never tell when someones flirting with me or if theyre just being nice. Turning the question around on them without actually having to answer? Despite not being the most popular topic of conversation, the concept of death has inspired quite a few clever and insightful sayings over the years. You may have noticed that I take a step back when we talk. Choose one of these responses to inject some life into your monotonous chats. 67. You don't want to give the same, bland answer all the time. This one is good. If there is just one valid reason for someone not replying to you, that reason would be their death. Finnish with this conversation! I think I am doing alright. Could have been worse, right. In a coma, you still have brain function, which doctors can measure by observing electrical activity and your reactions to external stimuli. You don't need to say it. Funny as phuck. Sarcastic Captions for Instagram. Im not ready to share my food with anyone yet. 27. Comeback for "oh you still alive".. : Comebacks - reddit Nothing that you probably cant figure out if you tried. 51 Funny and Flirty Responses to "How Are You" Texts To answer that question, I need to take you back about 12 years. If you're friendly and check in with each other here and there, reply but keep the conversation short. And it's time for me to make my escape. Like seriously, you hoped for him to be run over by a truck or something. This one kills me! Humans are sophisticated beings, but we are also creatures of habit who say one thing while we mean something else. Some good old fashioned sarcasm, there is nothing wrong with it. Im reminded of how unfair life is every time I see you. is willie rogers of the soul stirrers still alive; cal berkeley football recruiting questionnaire; american housewife cancelled. Well, I was trying to be invisible but I guess that didnt work. Alright so far, but there is plenty of time for things to get bad. Some of us are just destined to walk this world alone. Theres this one time when a cute guy/gal asked me if I have a boyfriend/girlfriend and I said yes because I didnt hear the question. You could totally take the high road: Lose their number and forget about them altogether or, you could do that after sending them a final funny (but fierce) text to bid your time together adieu. Youll go far someday. (perfect for vegans). Dont wake me up yet. 18. I'm fine. Also you texted very late; I would think one of my friends were joking or drunk since it's near Halloween. Here's the good news: I've collected plenty of answer options for you to make that unbearably awkward question a little more bearable. 7. If someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel much longer than it is. Keep asking and maybe one day youll get a sensible answer. Well, I have to go to work so Ill try and make the best of it. "I'm alright, mate". Thats the biggest joke Ive heard recently. Why dont you tell me, you seem to have a pretty good view from there. Clever comebacks not only showcase your distastethey demonstrate your intelligence, too. 15. This just in: Bad communication skills are not trending this season! 19. You sure have a bodacious rackfor a guy. Now that is pretty f****** funny. Hmmph. You are waiting for their reply, and they should be aware of this. You go first, lets see if mine was better or worse. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Some Funny Responses to Everyday Questions. This way, youre insulting themand they just might be dumb enough not to notice. Oh, stop it, will you? Looks like I overestimated the number of brain cells you have. What an impertinent question to ask a girl! Everyday that you're on the right side of the grass is a good day. "See, I will finally make you smile.". If I wanted to commit suicide, Id climb your ego and jump to your IQ level. You'll love these 67+ Sarcastic Instagram Captions for couples, friends Well, Im married to our lord and savior, Jesus Christ. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping." If corporate email language won't do it, nothing will. Ive had worse. Because you havent put a ring on it yet. Plotting how Im going to take over the world. 3 I'm Just Wondering How You Are All our lives, we were taught to follow our passion. Like are you asking because you really wanna hear whats up?. Joshua Burns, "Death is a delightful hiding place for weary men." Try a Humorous Reply when Someone Asks "How Are You?" - All Women's Talk If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. The truth is, if you really want to get him back, you should follow the steps outlined here.. Which one you use would depend on particular circumstances, but in the example you gave, I think "still alive" probably works best. The police? Because nowadays, the industry prefers singles over albums. Things can't get much better and you want the world to know. Not even the fussiest, or clingiest person in the world would expect a dead person to reply to them. Im still trying to figure out an answer to that question if Im honest. What's your sign? [Read: How to learn to be witty and win over everyone in the room]. Check out the following infographic for some practical tips to maintain a conversation and take it forward.SaveIllustration: StyleCraze Design Team. 101. I am doing a bit better than before, but not nearly as awesome as I am going to be. Martin holds a Masters degree in Finance and International Business. He sold it to me on his deathbed. If youre still single, some people will ask you for a reason or explanation, in one way or another. It is a humorous way of saying they have not heard from you in a while. "The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.9% of them are made by people who are still alive." Chuck Bass? Scientists say the universe is made up of electrons, protons, and neutrons. But, compared to messaging, pigeons are much slower. As geeky as it is, this funny response to I love you has got to make you chuckle. A truly stinging sarcastic response to I love you. Your email address will not be published. [Read: 20 wise medieval insults you could bring back into trend]. Cookie Notice Before I answer, I let you know that those who know my age get bad luck. In My Phone or On My Phone Which is Correct? If your best friends are worrying about you due to your new break up, this one you can use to make them feel relaxed. Damn, now why didnt you think of it earlier?! Its more likely that theyre just being a bad friend. Id love to insult you, but you probably wouldnt understand. To read all future answers to your comment, please bookmark this page. When someone really finds you funny over text, they may send laughing emoji or 'haha'. 16. Because your ass is out of this world! There's no reason why you should have to express emotions to whoever asked. Life is up to something. 2. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Id smack you, but that would be animal abuse. Reply. Whether you're in the jury or on the witness stand or on trial yourself, it's a tense and nail-biting environment. All rights reserved. A little bit worse now that youve asked. No, waitIm actually plural. But, you should know that, I don't like you, already. He has six years of experience in professional communication with clients, executives, and colleagues. WHY!? You just have bad luck at thinking. 29. Learn more about us here. 1. count_scoopula 6 yr. ago. 83. Use them as you see fit when someone pokes their nose on your relationship status. 75 Witty and Funny Responses to "How Are You?" - Box of Puns Moving in with Roommates?

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